i did not go on a blind date

A few things I have not nor would ever do:

I did not agree to go on a blind date knowing little to nothing about the person.

I did not not talk to him on the phone for less than three minutes only 20 minutes before meeting him for lunch.

I did not give this stranger a hug upon meeting him for the first time.

I did not admit within the first five minutes that I work at a church. Normal people don't talk about religion on a first date-that would be taboo and definitely not PC.

I definitely did not order a burger sans bread or cheese. I did not try to avoid explaining my food allergies. Upon explaining them my date did not try to comfort me by saying, "ya, it took me forever to figure out I was allergic to wool." I was not laughing hysterically in my mind. It was absolutely, most definitely not funny.

I was not relieved when he didn't offer to pray for lunch. The last boy I dated never prayed for dinner and it was never awkward. I definitely pray for every meal, snack and beverage regardless of whose company I am in. I'm pretty sure he does too. That's what all good christians do, right?

I did not share my major in college (religion). That would be awkward and potentially make for an awkward conversation with someone not prepared for what they were getting into.

I did not find out he practices a very, very different religion.

I did not admit that I secretly really want a bunny.

We absolutely did not end our date by going to look at bunnies at the pet store.

And I certainly would never point at and pet the bunnies oohing and awing about how cute and fluffy they are. I also did not share that I am really excited about the prospect of naming a bunny.

I did not not know his last name by the time I got home.

I did not make my roommate look him up on Facebook to find out.

Brought to you by Not me Monday.