signs you know you're watching the BET awards

[this post is thanks in part to my sister, Rev. Corrina]

Top reasons you know you're watching the BET awards:

1. The entire audience sings along to every song.
2. A gospel choir shows up in every song.
3. At least half the artists make references to artists who have recently done time.
4. You mistake at least one artist's mom for his girlfriend because, let's be honest, she probably had him at 14.
5. Everyone loves Jesus.
6. Everyone thanks Jesus.
7. Yolanda Adams performs.
8. Chris Brown does a tribute to Michael Jackson, who had already written a biography by the time said performer was born.
9. The show more resembles a pentecostal worship service than an actual award show.
10. You can't remember the last award that was actually given.
11. Queen Latifah's sexuality is still up for debate (thanks large in part to her own commentary).
12. During every commercial break you see an ad for anti-frizz hair products.
13. The only song featuring a white girl is performed instead by a black girl.
14. Eminem is still considered black (and still allowed to perform in above mentioned song).
15. Stevie Wonder makes an appearance and no one knows why.
16. Half the audience is wearing white.
17. Someone remakes a song originally sung by a white person, and does a better job at it.
18. The artist formally known as "Prince" joins in on his own tribute by wearing a shirt with a picture of himself on it.
19. Two names: Alicia Keys and Patty Labelle.
20. The audience leaves at the end of the night complaining of arm spasms (see #9).


Happy watching.