before i'm dead and gone

I've been known to talk about [swoon after] "The Buried Life" boys. I'm not sure if it's their boyish looks, fervor for life, or willingness to put themselves on the line that makes them so appealing. Either way Lord knows these boys have balls and a willingness to sacrifice them for the sake of living a full, adventurous life.

Since watching the first season of the show last winter I myself have thought about what my own buried list might look like. For those of you who have not seen the show, 4 boys (in their 20's) have created a collaborative list of the things they want to accomplish before they die (i.e. are buried). Such a list might also be knows as a "Bucket List", as in, "Before I kick the bucket, this is what I want to do with my life." My own list is elementary in comparison, although I've managed to a include a few things I would legitimately love to pull off at some point in my life. What I love about the show is these guys' willingness to drop everything, get a bus, and make shit happen. Now, I realize these guys have a T.V. show, financial support, and a huge following at this point, but they had to get the show, the money, and the bus somehow, right? You may call it chance or luck, but after watching two seasons worth of what some might call youthful antics, I see a bunch of ballsy guys willing to work for what they want.

Now the question is, can I say they same for myself?

Plenty of things have prevented me from accomplishing things I would have loved to accomplish by now. Part of me accepts that it is what it is and certain things will happen in their own timing. With that being said, however, how much am I taking a hold of my life to make things happen? I realize I cannot simply sit back and wait for my life, my dreams, my goals to happen; it just doesn't work like that. I know that, and yet the endless possibilities are strangely paralyzing. I hate that quality about myself.

So what am I going to do about it?

That is a great question for someone who is naturally adventurous. You'd think that "independence" would couple well with an adventurous spirit, but apparently there is a no two for one sale in that department. At the same time though I am quite adventurous. I am confrontational and seem to have no problem with honesty. I surprise myself sometimes with the things I say or am willing to do. I wish there were more of a pattern to go off of, but really I'm not sure how much consistency there is in regard to my spontaneity. You might say I'm a little bit "scattered". Perhaps I am more adventurous when in the company of good friends. Safe people. People I can be myself with. If that's the case, then I better get these people on board to help me get on with my list.

Speaking of which. What's on your list? If you tell me yours, I'll tell you mine.